... if she was still alive. But Mamichi decided that this world was not good enough for her, and started the journey towards the stars.
I remember those last days clearly, although they are sprinkled with her hallucinations and morphine speaking. She was calm and ready to go. But then, suddenly, she seemed scared, uncertain, filled with sporadic bursts of anxiety. I did my best to be there, bold and serene--with that same serenity she had always had, and which I admired so much. And I told her something that I believe stubbornly--that we would meet again, in other bodies, living different lives, being other people, but continuing to move across time in those little circles of souls that always manage to find each other again. I said that we might even recognize each other, as ancient souls that know they have been together before. (I am not so certain about that last piece anymore).
This mantra attached itself to my believe system when Vati died, and when I suddenly found a way to make sense out of the futility of his choices. It was a long painful process, which became serene and peaceful when he asked, looking straight into my eyes, "what are fourteen years in the face of eternity?" Fourteen years was what I had spent trying to see him again. Sixteen years have gone by since then. And I still believe, stubbornly, that our souls will touch each other again.
May peace, love and light be with the souls of Vati and Mamichi, always.
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BURNT NORTON
(No. 1 of 'Four Quartets')
T.S. Eliot
I
Time present and time past
Are both perhaps present in time future,
And time future contained in time past.
If all time is eternally present
All time is unredeemable.
What might have been is an abstraction
Remaining a perpetual possibility
Only in a world of speculation.
What might have been and what has been
Point to one end, which is always present.
Footfalls echo in the memory
Down the passage which we did not take
Towards the door we never opened
Into the rose-garden. My words echo
Thus, in your mind.
Lagarto querido--tenerte entre mis amigos es de lo mejor que me ha pasado. Siempre tienes la palabra exacta. Te quiero enormidades!
Un halago así de parte de una de las personas a las que más quiero y admiro en el mundo me llena de emoción. Eres absolutamente correspondida en tu cariño, Lagartija querida.
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